The Quest Begins!

So, I've decided to take up a challenge (I wasn't actually challenged by someone, I just consider it a challenge because its hard for me). I am going to grow a mustache. After having many recent discussions about this style of facial hair with my buddy Jake, I am motivated to get one. I make it sound like you can just go out to a store a get a mustache from the mustache store, take it up to the counter and buy it from a guy sporting a Dali mustache. Unfortunately, its not that simple.

Growing a stache will take a lot of patience and time. It will also require some care of the hairs that'll grow above my upper lip. I'll need to make it JUST RIGHT so I won't look like a creep.

This may be the hardest task of my life. This is a quest to achieve a special stage of manhood. Only the worthy are worth (??) to sport a stache proudly. These people include Ron Burgundy and Tom Selleck. Most people other than these two fail at everything.

The definition of manhood.

Mustaches were popular with a certain group of people: dictators. People such as Hitler, Stalin, Saddam Houssein, etc. etc. You notice that these men, although evil, got shit done (for a while at least). You look at wannabe rulers like Mussolini and Gadahfi, they didn't have mustaches and they were/are getting their butts handed to them! 

See a trend? People with mustaches have a sort of super natural power that I wish to obtain one day. This quest may take a very long time, or I may sprout thousands of hairs over night, you never know. But be warned, if you make fun of my mustache when its just a trashy little bit of hair, beware of my wrath when it is more full than a clown car. 

"Its magic. You just have to pet it and take care of it"